


A New Start from an Old Beginning

by still_lycoris



Category: X-Men (Original Timeline Movies), X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014) - Fandom
Genre: Antagonism, Coping, M/M, Memory Alteration, Misunderstandings, Referenced Open Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-15
Updated: 2017-12-15
Packaged: 2019-02-10 17:40:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12916923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/still_lycoris/pseuds/still_lycoris
Summary: Logan is struggling to get used to the new time that he now lives in - the world has changed and the people have too. He certainly never expected to find that things had changed so much between him and Scott Summers. And he certainly didn't expect to have to decide what to do about it ...





	A New Start from an Old Beginning

**Author's Note:**

  * For [cygnaut](https://archiveofourown.org/users/cygnaut/gifts).



It was pretty weird, waking up and finding that about fifty years of your life hadn’t happened the way you thought they had.

Some bits had apparently happened in kinda the same way. The same people were around in the mansion (with a few extras), a lot of whom acted the same (for better or worse.) Rogue beamed at him like they were still friends. Storm gave him one of those serene smiles that she only directed at the people she cared about. The Professor treated him like he always had but even there, Logan felt there was a new warmth, something odd that had changed that made the Professor more proud of him than ever. Beast growled affectionately at him, thanked him for changing the world and making things right. Apparently, he’d never left the mansion and he and the Professor were obviously closer than Logan remembered them being.

Jean was alive. Jean was ... Jean.

And Scott Summers was a moody, stuck-up tightass. So, that was all familiar and made Logan feel at home. Only not. Because everything was just that little bit off.

For a start, apparently the Professor and Magneto were all buddy-buddy now. Thankfully, Magneto hung out at his own place – with Peter because apparently Peter was his _kid_ and Logan kinda wished someone had told him _that_ some time ago – but everyone assured him that the guy came over for parties and chats and whatever and he and the Professor fought about whatever they disagreed about and then Magneto went home again and they stayed friends. And Mystique hung out at the school too, since she was a _teacher_ there as after the thing with Apocalypse (who?!), she and Charles had made nice. Which was all well and good but it was a bit weird to eat breakfast across the table from someone you vividly remembered stabbing.

And though Scott was his familiar little tight-ass self, he also seemed to be sulking about something and it was driving Logan crazy.

Scott had showed up in his room as Logan had been poking around, trying to find out what he did and didn’t own from his “other” life. It wasn’t easy. There wasn’t much stuff but it was a weird mix of familiar and not-familiar, just like everything else.

“If you kept it tidy, it’d be easier for you to find things,” Scott said.

He said it almost conversationally but it made Logan jump. And one thing he really hated was people making him jump, particularly if they were making him jump by being a condescending asshole.

“Thanks for the input, Slim,” he growled, not bothering to turn around. 

He expected Scott to move get the hint but Scott didn’t. Now Logan knew he was there, he could hear him just standing there. He ignored him, moving some of his stuff in a noisy, deliberately careless way, mostly trying to piss Scott off. Scott still didn’t move.

“Was there something you actually wanted?” Logan asked eventually, turning to glare at him. “Or are you just here to be a condescending ass?”

“Condescending, I suppose,” Scott said.

He sounded even more like he had something rammed up his butt than usual and he was holding himself like that too; all ram-rod stiff and tense. Before Logan could say anything else, he’d turned and walked away, pretty fast, like he didn’t want to hear anything else Logan might have to say.

Which was a bit weird, since normally, Scott either let the stuff Logan say roll off his back or argued back like there was nothing he wanted to do more in the world than fight about whether he was a prick or not.

Logan wasn’t in the mood for any more mysteries. Life was full of quite enough of _those._

They all tried to help him, of course.

Charles pretty much gave him a crash course in “fifty years you missed” which was mostly just an overview of all the stuff that had happened in the real world. Beast found him and gave him a quick lecture that mostly seemed to be about science and literature because, well, Beast. Rogue told him about the time they’d spent together – which was kinda helpful because at least it gave him an idea of what was different between them and what was the same.

Scott avoided him. Which should have been ideal only Logan felt like there was something pointed about it. Sometimes, he’d realise Scott was looking at him and Scott seemed like he was thinking something complicated but whenever he realised Logan was looking at him, he’d look quickly away. 

Logan wasn’t quite sure if he ought to ask anybody about that. He hated asking anyway. He _hated_ not knowing all this shit. He had half-accepted not knowing his past before but now he knew a past that didn’t exist ... or _sometimes_ didn’t exist ...

How could you fucking trust anything when everything you’d ever lived through was something that had only happened to you?

When he thought about it too much, he had to go and kill stuff in the Danger Room for a bit. At least when you programmed something to attack you, it stayed the same. The familiar bite of the claws coming out of his hands, that was the same too. The unnatural glimmer of metal, the jarring feel that always accompanied thrusting them into an opponent ... yeah. That was all something that he at least _knew_.

He had finished a pretty good session and was just leaving the room when Scott walked in.

“You know, the Danger Room isn’t actually supposed to be your personal gym,” he said.

“Just working off a little steam,” Logan said. “Nothing wrong with that.”

“Unless someone else needs to use the Danger Room. Ever thought of finding another way to work off steam?”

Logan rolled his eyes.

“Unlike you, I need something a little more physical than the Scrabble board to work off steam.”

He sort of expected Scott to laugh at this or do one of those head movements that Logan was pretty sure translated as eye-rolling. To this slight surprise, Scott didn’t do either. In fact, he tensed up like Logan had just insulted his mother.

“You really have no idea, do you?”

“No idea of _what?_ ” Logan was genuinely bewildered and pretty annoyed. He’d just managed to get himself wound down and now here was Summers, getting him all wound up again. He didn’t _want_ to slug Summers in the face ... at least, not really. But damn, he was thinking about it.

“Forget it,” Scott said flatly. “Stop using the Danger Room like a toy.”

He turned and stalked off, frame filled with what Logan could only really describe as fury. Which he wasn’t really used to. What the hell was Summers so mad about?!

He didn’t know. It was weird and uncomfortable, just like a lot of stuff right now. And now all the tension that he’d worked off was back which was really not what he’d had in mind.

He took a long shower which was mostly interrupted by irritated thoughts about Scott and his stupid stick-up-the-ass actions and the feeling that he just didn’t have control. He wanted everything back, he wanted to know who he was, he wanted ...

But he’d never totally known who he was. So really, it was just more of the same.

He was heading back to his room when he heard Jean’s voice.

“ – talk to him.”

“I don’t _want_ to talk to him.” Scott sounded surprisingly angry. “I’m not going to ... it’s not happened so that’s all there is to it.”

“Perhaps there was never an opportunity for him,” Jean said, her voice very gentle.

“It doesn’t matter. It is what it is. It ... doesn’t matter, Jean.”

And now, Scott sounded ... sad. Like there was something he’d lost and no matter what he did, he didn’t think he’d get it back.

Logan knew how that felt. He didn’t like to hear it in someone else, even when they were as annoying as Scott Summers. He kinda wanted someone to say something only suddenly, he couldn’t hear the conversation anymore and it hit him that someone – either Jean or Chuck – had been letting him hear something that he probably hadn’t been meant to overhear.

Thinking some loud thoughts about meddling telepaths that knew fuck-all about shit, he went to bed and tried not to think about exactly what it was that hadn’t happened that had got Scott so riled up.

*

By morning, he’d decided the best thing to do would be to confront Scott directly. He’d always found that problems were best dealt with by violence, shouting or ignoring. Probably he could start this one with shouting, possibly going up to hitting if Scott remained particularly annoying and then go back to ignoring him like he’d never been there. 

Of course, Scott tried to get in the way of this plan by avoiding him. He wasn’t at breakfast. He wasn’t in the library. He wasn’t in his room. In the end, Logan had sniff him out and found him in the garage, of all places, messing with a bike.

“Ain’t that my bike?” Logan said, pretty sure it wasn’t but not able to resist the jab.

“Only when you steal it,” Scott said. “And then you leave it in a mess and I have to clean it and give it a proper service.”

He sounded almost amused for a moment but then his voice seemed to trail off and he began to scrub at the side of the bike like it needed a clean when it clearly didn’t.

“So, what’s the problem?” Logan said, leaning against the door and folding his arms.

“Problem?” Scott said.

“You’ve got a problem. What is it?”

“Besides you interrupting me while I’m busy?”

Logan had seen that coming and didn’t react to it. He just stood there, staring at Scott, who stubbornly refused to stare at him. He continued to scrub at his not-actually-dirty bike – which wasn’t really like Scott Summers. He was – or had been – always pretty happy to square up to Logan in an annoying I-won’t-fight-you-we’re-on-the-same-team-even-if-I-want-to-deck-you-right-now kind of way. 

Despite the fact that so much had changed, Logan wasn’t sure he wanted Scott to have changed. He wanted to keep something the same. He kind of liked Scott as he was.

That was something he didn’t want to dwell on too much.

“Yeah. Besides that.”

“I don’t have a problem besides that,” Scott said.

“Okay, see, you’re lying. And Boy Scout Scott Summers lying ... kind of weird to me.”

“Stuff’s changed, remember? The world’s different now.”

Scott sounded a little bitter which was weird. Why should _he_ care? It wasn’t his world that had fallen apart and been pieced together in a weird patchwork of bad-past, good-past, was it? Why the fuck did he even _care?_

Logan lost his temper.

“Stop being such a damn snot and talk like the leader you’re supposed to be! What the hell is your problem? Is there something that happened that I don’t know about and should? Because if there is, you can just damn well tell me and stop sulking about it!”

“I’m not sulking!” Scott snapped back. “Just ... leave it alone, Logan.”

“You’re not the one whose lost chunks of his past. _Again_. So if there’s something important I don’t know about, don’t you think you’ve got a duty to fucking tell me?”

That clearly hit home, as he’d rather hoped it would. Scott paused, evidently taking in what Logan had said. After all, one thing Scott Summers was big on was duty.

“You aren’t the only one whose past has changed,” Scott said finally, his expression impossible to read.

“Yeah, but I’m the only one who remembers things that never happened. Don’t play dumb with me, Summers, you know what I mean and you know what I want.”

“They might as well have never happened if you don’t remember them,” Scott said. He sounded almost thoughtful, as though they were having some sort of philosophical debate and Logan wasn’t sure what annoyed him more: that Scott was apparently seeing it that way or that Logan could kind of see his point.

“So. What happened?” he asked, going for the easiest route and returning to the point.

“Logan, leave it. It doesn’t _matter_ what happened. It didn’t happen.”

“It matters to me, Slim! And it seems to matter a hell of a lot to you too so just damn well tell me! What, I beat you in a fight and you’re still sore? I got one over on you somewhere? I – ”

“You and I were sleeping together, actually.”

Scott said it very primly, almost like he was starting some sex-ed class. He went back to polishing his bike as he continued.

“It just sort of happened. These things do sometimes, so I’m told. We were arguing and then we were ... doing that instead. It was mutually enjoyed, we – but it’s never happened to you, now. So it doesn’t matter.”

Logan stared at him, slowly taking the words in. If it had been anyone else, he’d have assumed it was some sort of joke but Scott Summers wasn’t the type to make something like that up.

“You ... and me?” he said.

“Yes,” Scott said briskly. “So. Now you know.”

It was difficult to picture, though not impossible. Logan had been with men before, it wasn’t something that bothered him in itself. But with Scott _Summers?_ Okay, he wasn’t _bad_ looking in a buttoned-up sort of way. But he was ... well.

Scott put down the rag that he’d been using to clean the completely spotless bike. 

“I’m going to wash up,” he said, pushed past Logan and was gone in a moment. Logan stared after him, still trying to process it all. 

Scott Summers. And him. And it sounded like they’d done it more than once – and that they’d enjoyed it enough that it was really bothering Scott that Logan no longer had that experience.

Hardly surprising really. It was weird enough having giant chunks of his own life that hadn’t happened the way he thought. It was probably a bit weird for everyone else too since now _they_ had great chunks of their life that hadn’t happened the way he thought.

His first impulse was to walk away. Everything was screwed up around here ... in an annoyingly happy sort of way ... and being away from it all would let him sort himself out. He could go check out the old places, see what they were like. Get a taste of the difference of the world by actually living in it. It wasn’t like he was actually teaching here at the moment, since he didn’t remember the damn history. Why not just go travelling?

Only it seemed ... cowardly. He kept thinking about the way Scott had spoken, the rigid set of his shoulders, the way he’d kept cleaning that damn bike like he didn’t care when he so obviously did.

Why had this other self of his decided to hook up with _Scott?_ Okay, Scott Summers wasn’t bad looking. Okay, maybe he was even good-looking. Maybe he was a bit prim and buttoned-up but okay, there was fun in trying to break someone out of that. Maybe he’d just decided to fuck him for the amusement of trying to wind him up. It felt like the kind of thing that he would do. And it had to have been good – Scott hadn’t described it as a onetime fuck and even Summers wouldn’t be this wound up if it had been.

Jesus, a relationship with _Summers?_ This past version of him had obviously been some sort of fucking masochist.

“You said that at the time too.”

He had been so deep in thought that he hadn’t noticed Jean approaching. She smiled at him in a way that might have been meant to be apologetic but clearly wasn’t, then sat next to him.

“Don’t you care?” Logan asked bluntly. “Pretty sure he’s still married to you, right?”

“He is,” Jean said. She paused for a moment, head slightly tilted to one side. “It’s ... I never minded. I know the things that Scott needs in life. If he can find them, I’m happy for him.”

“What about the things you need in life?”

“Scott doesn’t mind if I find what I need too.”

Jean sounded quite calm and Logan looked at her and realised she was different too. Whatever had changed, all the things that had happened that he didn’t remember ... this Jean wasn’t like the Jean he’d met before and whatever she and Scott Summers shared wasn’t the same thing that they’d shared in the world he’d lived in before. It was kind of intriguing but he didn’t think that this was the moment to think on it too much.

“You should do what you need to do,” Jean said. “Your life is your own, everything that’s changed around you ... but I thought you should know. Maybe I’m just a meddling telepath –” She smiled then and he knew that she’d definitely heard his angry thoughts. “ – but I thought you should make the decision based on everything that’s real to him and to you. Not just on what one of you thinks happens.”

She stood up and touched his shoulder lightly before walking away. Logan wasn’t quite sure if she’d helped him or not. He felt annoyed at her interference. He felt confused, something that he loathed. He felt just a little bit lost. 

Before, he’d been able to tell himself that a lot of what he’d lost, he had been well rid of. It was his past, he had right to it but if it was gone, well, probably a lot of it wasn’t something that it really mattered to have lost. Now, he felt cheated. Like what had gone _had_ mattered.

But what could he do? He could be told any number of things but there was no chance of the memories returning. They had never happened to him. His mind had wiped out that Logan that had gone before and that Logan could never be brought back. He would always remember a false past.

Well. The future could be all that mattered then.

He liked to make up his mind quickly and without dwelling on stuff. A decision made always made him feel better, a decision acted upon was the best cure for anything. Getting to his feet, he went, for the second time that day, to find Scott Summers.

Scott was in his room reading – or pretending to read, it was hard to tell which. He had obviously noticed Logan’s arrival but studiously pretended that he hadn’t, even when Logan stepped in and closed the door.

“Gonna ignore me forever, Slim?”

“Have I ever told you that I wish you wouldn’t call me that?”

“Not me. Maybe him? Although we’re the same person, right?”

He could see Scott’s mind dwelling on that. Slowly, Logan moved closer to him, waiting for the answer.

“I don’t know,” Scott said at last, his voice quiet. “You act very similar. Most of the time.”

“I think we’re the same,” Logan said firmly. “Different memories maybe but the same person.”

“Why are you telling me this/”

“Why’d you think, Scott?”

He saw Scott’s fingers twitch on the book he was still holding. Logan took a deep breath – not that he was _nervous_ , of course not, he never got nervous – and then took a final few steps so he was right in front o Scott.

“Since there’s a whole heap of important stuff I don’t remember, why don’t you go about filling me in?”

Scott looked up at him. Logan stared back, blunt, direct, waiting. When Scott showed no signs of getting up himself, Logan reached down and half-lifted him so they were face to face.

“Well?” he said and when Scott still showed no signs of movement, Logan kissed him.

Not a bad kiss as kisses went. Got better swiftly as Scott suddenly responded, hands coming up to grip Logan’s shoulders, body pressing tight against him. There was more strength there than Logan expected – or perhaps it was just that he hadn’t expected Scot to be quite such a determined kisser. He clearly knew what he wanted and exactly how he planned to get it – no bad thing in Logan’s view.

“You gonna show me what I’ve been missing then?” he asked and was rewarded with another extremely firm kiss.

Answer was probably _yes_ then.

*

He had to admit, it was pretty damn good. He hadn’t predicted that it would be this good, not when he’d thought about it before.

(It occurred to him that the fact he’d even thought about how good Scott Summers might be in bed was pretty telling, in hindsight.)

Of course, Scott was a cuddler. Almost the moment they were done, he pulled Logan into an embrace against his shoulder, apparently thinking that Logan might want this. 

“Did the other me let you cuddle him like a teddy bear, Slim?”

“Yes,” Scott said, He sounded sleepy. “All the time. He liked cuddles more than anything.”

“Slim, are you lying to me?”

“Maybe.”

Logan managed not to laugh at that though it was a close run thing. He jabbed Scott in the side but Scott just wriggled and settled down again. Apparently, he was a sleeper as well as a cuddler and there didn’t really seem to be any reason to keep him awake.

There didn’t seem any real reason to stay awake himself for that matter. He felt sleepy and right now at least, safe and content. And it had been a long damn time since he’d felt properly content and as for _safe_ ...

He wasn’t sure it would last. He wasn’t sure what was going to happen when they both woke up. He’d still have all the confusion, still be a remnant of a lost time living in a world that had moved in a way that he didn’t entirely understand. And all past experiences showed that things didn’t last the way you hoped they might.

But he might as well make the most of it while it did.

And who knew, maybe this time, it would be different.

He’d changed the whole world, after all.


End file.
